One month

One month one month one month. 

I hear this screaming in my head building and building. One month. It feels like years. It feels like no time at all. It's a quarter of the time that mom had. 

My auntie asked what helped when I was feeling low in the past. Talking to my mom, of course. It's the only thing that ever was. 

There's a hole in my heart and it's empty and I am lost.